Woman Says a Facebook Dating Match Suggested Trails and a Neck Rub — Then She Blocked Him Before the First Date

A woman says she already felt strange about using dating apps, but after one Facebook Dating match suggested a first date involving a long drive, trails, and him rubbing her back, feet, or neck, she decided she had heard enough.

She explained in a Reddit post that she does not normally date on apps because they weird her out. This time, she had decided to try Facebook Dating after feeling hurt and frustrated by a man in her life who had been acting hot and cold.

According to the woman, that man had not come to see her for three or four weeks. He had stopped by the day before, told her he loved her, and made plans for the next day. Then, as usual, he canceled, saying he had to help his dad fix his truck.

She said she understood that things come up, but this had become a pattern. Over four years, she could count only one time he had taken her anywhere that even resembled a real date.

So she decided to try something different.

She told herself they were not married, and if he kept canceling and leaving her hanging, she was allowed to talk to someone else. That is when she started chatting with a man on Facebook Dating.

At first, the new conversation seemed to be going well. They talked about likes, dislikes, and the usual early dating questions. Eventually, he asked what her idea of a good first date would be.

Her answer included having people around.

That made sense. She did not know this man. He was a stranger from an app. A public first date is not dramatic; it is basic safety.

Then she asked what his ideal first date would be.

His answer immediately bothered her.

He said he liked the idea of going on a long drive, walking some trails, and maybe ending with him rubbing her back, feet, or neck.

She did not respond. She blocked him.

The trails were the first thing that made her uneasy. To her, the idea of going on trails with a man she had never met felt unsafe. A long drive and a walk on trails are not exactly public, low-pressure first-date options. They can put someone far away from other people and dependent on the other person for transportation.

The massage comment made it worse.

It was not just, “Let’s grab coffee,” or “Let’s meet at a park with other people around.” It was a date plan that moved quickly into physical contact. Back, feet, or neck rubbing may sound casual to some people, but from a stranger on a dating app, it felt too intimate too soon.

She also said he had mentioned trails more than once, which made it feel less like a random harmless idea and more like something he was pushing.

After blocking him, she wondered if she had overreacted. Maybe he liked the outdoors. Maybe he thought trails sounded peaceful. Maybe he genuinely meant a walk in nature and a relaxing massage, not anything creepy.

But her gut told her otherwise.

That is the strange part about early online dating. Sometimes you do not have a dramatic red flag. You have one sentence that sounds wrong, one plan that places you too far from people, or one suggestion that skips several steps of normal comfort. The safest choice may feel abrupt, but it is still a choice you get to make.

The woman did not insult him. She did not string him along. She did not agree to a date and then cancel at the last minute. She simply decided the plan made her uncomfortable and blocked him before it went any further.

In that sense, she caught the discomfort early.

The post was archived and locked, so there was no update about whether he tried to contact her again. But the question she asked was simple: was it creepy, or was she overreacting?

Given that her own first-date idea included public safety and his included isolation plus physical touching, a lot of people understood why she trusted the bad feeling.

Commenters were somewhat split, but many understood why she blocked him. Several said trails are not automatically creepy, especially in places where hiking is a normal first-date idea. But they agreed that a long drive, isolated trails, and physical rubbing from a stranger made the full answer feel uncomfortable.

Some commenters said he may have simply been outdoorsy and awkward, especially if he lives somewhere where hiking is common. But others pushed back that a first date should be somewhere both people feel safe, and he should have respected that she wanted people around.

A lot of commenters focused on the massage part. Back, feet, and neck rubbing felt too intimate for someone he had not even met yet. To them, that detail changed the tone from “maybe he likes hiking” to “why is he already planning to touch her?”

Others told her she did not need a huge reason to block someone on a dating app. If a person’s idea of a first date makes you uncomfortable, that is enough.

The clearest advice was to trust her instincts. A first date should not start with a plan that makes one person feel trapped, isolated, or pressured into physical contact.