Teen Worker Says a Coworker Pretended to Smack Her Body — Then Brought Valentine’s Gifts After She Told Him Not To

Photo credit: Milos Dimic/istock.com

An 18-year-old worker says she thought graduating high school meant she was finally done dealing with a guy who had always made her uncomfortable. Then, about a month after graduation, he started working at the same job.

She explained in a Reddit post that she had known him from high school and never liked being around him. He had always tried to pester her into friendship, but she said he gave her a weird gut feeling and came across as negative and self-pitying. When she graduated, she assumed she would not have to deal with him anymore.

Then he got hired at her workplace.

At first, she tried to be fair. She got to know him a little better, and while she still felt uneasy, he seemed tolerable enough as a coworker. But once he became more comfortable around her and the rest of the staff, the behavior started getting worse.

The first big issue happened when she bent over to grab something at work. According to the teen, he made a fake hitting gesture toward her body and added a verbal smacking sound effect, like he was pretending to smack her butt.

She shut that down immediately and told him never to do it again.

Instead of simply apologizing and stopping, he apparently sulked for the rest of the day and spiraled into self-deprecating comments. That reaction frustrated her because she had been the one disrespected, yet he made himself the emotional center of the situation.

After that, the comments about her appearance started.

If she came into work with curled hair or more makeup than usual, he would say things like, “You look good today.” At first, a compliment might not sound alarming, but the pattern escalated. One day, she made an offhand comment about being hot because she had been working hard. He responded with something along the lines of, “Well yeah, everyone knows that,” then went on a tangent about how everyone in the building probably thought she was hot.

Nearby coworkers noticed.

The attention was no longer private awkwardness. Other people were seeing how uncomfortable it was becoming.

Then he started bringing her drinks.

The first time, she tried to refuse because she felt bad accepting it. He pressured her into taking it anyway. After that, he started showing up at work almost every day with a drink for her. Every time, she told him not to do it anymore.

He ignored her.

His answer was that he liked getting her things and liked seeing her happy. But from her side, it was not making her happy at all. She was scolding him every time, and he kept treating her refusal like a minor obstacle instead of a real no.

The situation got worse the day before Valentine’s Day.

She was multitasking in a drive-thru-style rush, taking orders and cashing people out, when he came up and asked what her favorite candies were. Because she was busy and wanted him to leave, she answered without thinking much about why he was asking.

Then it clicked.

She pulled him aside and told him clearly not to get her anything. She said she meant it and that if he bought her something, she would be mad.

He gave the same answer as before: he wanted to.

On Valentine’s Day, he came into work and told her he had left something for her in the break room. She went in and found two drinks, a king-sized candy bar, a bag of sour candy, and a bag of pistachios.

She was furious.

She told him she appreciated the effort, but she also made it clear that he had disrespected her boundary. She had told him directly not to get her a gift, and he did it anyway. She said she was not yelling or being cruel. She was trying to explain that “don’t get me anything” should have meant exactly that.

He reacted by sulking for the rest of the day, acting as if she had hurt him because she did not like the gift.

That reaction made her question herself. She knew boundaries mattered. She knew she had already told him no several times. But seeing him get so upset made her wonder if she had been too harsh or if she had overreacted.

In the comments, she added even more context. She said he constantly complains about not having friends and asks her to hang out outside work. She always says no. One time, he asked if she could at least consider it. She told him she already had, and she did not want to.

He still kept pushing.

She also said the idea that he may have taken the job to be near her had started to bother her after commenters brought it up. She had worked there for years, and he started there shortly after they graduated high school. She said plenty of people from their school knew where she worked, so it was possible he found out that way.

By the end, she seemed stuck between anger and fear. She did not want workplace drama, but she also did not want to keep managing a coworker who treated every no like a challenge and every boundary like something he could wear down.

Commenters overwhelmingly told her she was not overreacting. Many said the pretend body-smacking gesture alone was enough to take seriously, especially in a workplace.

A lot of people said she needed to stop softening her boundaries with thanks or appreciation. Commenters understood she was trying to be polite, but they warned that someone like this might hear “thank you” and ignore the actual “stop.”

Several commenters told her to report the behavior to a manager or HR. They pointed to the appearance comments, the unwanted gifts, the repeated requests to hang out, and the way he kept pushing after she said no.

Others were especially concerned that he started working at the same place after high school. Not everyone thought that proved anything, but many said the timing was suspicious enough to document.

Some commenters suggested one final direct statement with a witness nearby: she does not want a friendship or romantic relationship, she does not want gifts, she does not want comments about her appearance, and future contact should stay work-related.

The strongest advice was that she was not responsible for managing his emotions. He was the one creating the problem by ignoring clear boundaries, then sulking when she enforced them.