Woman says she moved her friend across state lines to help him — and now she wants him out of the apartment
In a Reddit post that started with good intentions, one woman said she offered to help a friend get back on his feet by bringing him to live with her in a new state. According to the post, she covered the upfront costs to get the apartment set up, including deposits and initial expenses, because he did not have the money at the time. The plan, she said, was simple—he would contribute once he got settled, and they would share responsibilities like normal roommates.
But she said it did not take long for things to feel off. Instead of stepping up, she described him falling into a pattern where she was handling nearly everything around the apartment. Cleaning, organizing, keeping things running—it all landed on her. On top of that, she said she was also taking care of his cat, which added another layer of responsibility she had not fully signed up for. What was supposed to feel like helping a friend quickly started to feel like she had taken on another person to manage.
The situation got more frustrating the longer it went on. She wrote that the balance never really shifted, even after he had time to get settled. Instead of things evening out, she said she kept feeling like the only one putting in effort. Small things built up—mess left behind, responsibilities ignored, the general feeling that she was the one keeping the place together while he coasted. It stopped feeling like a shared space and started feeling like she was the one holding everything up while he benefited from it.
At some point, she said the resentment started outweighing the original reason she had helped him in the first place. What had begun as a favor turned into something she could not ignore anymore. She wrote that she had reached the point where she was seriously considering asking him to leave, even though she was the one who had brought him there. The part that seemed to bother her most was not just the imbalance—it was the realization that helping someone had put her in a worse position in her own home.
Abbie Clark is the founder and editor of Now Rundown, covering the stories that hit households first—health, politics, insurance, home costs, scams, and the fine print people often learn too late.
