Woman Says Her Best Friend Begged Her To Fly Cross-Country — Then Abandoned Her for a Boyfriend All Weekend

A college student says she spent hundreds of dollars and more than 11 hours traveling to visit her best friend for Halloween, only to feel like she had been invited into someone else’s life and then forgotten about.

She shared the situation in a Reddit post, explaining that she and her best friend had been close for about nine years, going back to their mid-teens. The friend had moved away a few years earlier and “begged” her to visit for Halloween, so the poster agreed, even though getting there was expensive and stressful. She described herself as broke and said the trip involved three flights, long delays, last-minute rebooking stress and 11.5 total hours in airports and airplanes.

At first, things seemed fine. Then the friend took her grocery shopping and made it clear the poster would be paying for her own food. That felt strange after the poster had already paid so much to travel there, but she tried to let it go. The bigger problem came once the best friend’s boyfriend entered the picture.

On Halloween night, they went to a local bar show, and the poster said the car ride was painfully awkward because her best friend and the boyfriend talked almost exclusively to each other. Once they arrived, the friend did not introduce her to local friends until several minutes later, after everyone had already been awkwardly looking at her. The poster said she had to physically pull her best friend along multiple times just to get her to hang out.

At one point, she realized she was not being included in photos either. She said she ended up drunkenly inserting herself into one because she had traveled all that way and felt like there would not even be proof she had been there. One of the friend’s local friends eventually invited her into pictures, but not the best friend she had actually flown to see.

Then she lost track of her best friend in the crowded bar.

That part hit harder later. At the time, she tried to laugh it off, but in hindsight, she was alone, drunk, in a packed bar, in a place she did not know, while wearing Halloween makeup and a costume. A stranger even asked where her friend was, and when she said she did not know, the stranger pointed out how rough it was that she had come all that way and had basically been abandoned.

The night got worse when they got home. The best friend said her boyfriend was going to sleep in the bed for “a few hours” and asked if the poster would be okay sleeping on the couch. The poster has serious back issues from a past surgery and said her best friend knows she cannot comfortably sleep anywhere but a bed. Still, she hesitantly agreed because it did not feel like a real question.

After they got home, the poster called a friend back home. When she finished the call, she realized her best friend and the boyfriend had gone upstairs, shut the bedroom door and stopped responding. She knocked and texted about her belongings, but got no answer, even though she could hear them inside. Eventually, her backpack and purse were placed outside the bedroom door without a word, leaving her to change in the living room and try to sleep in a chair.

Later, after the boyfriend finally left, she went upstairs to bed and sent a drunk, upset message saying the situation was weird and not okay. The next day, the best friend said the boyfriend had needed to “sober up” and acted like they had already talked through the plan. The poster apologized for her own reaction, but the hurt did not stop there.

The next Halloween event pushed her over the edge. They were supposed to go to a bigger party together, but the poster found out from the roommate that her best friend had asked the roommate to drive her instead because the friend wanted to go with the boyfriend. The poster walked away and cried. She had spent money, time and energy to visit someone who begged her to come, only to be treated like a spare person to arrange around the boyfriend.

She ended up not going to the party because she was too upset. Her best friend went anyway, then did not come home that night because she slept at the boyfriend’s house. That left the poster alone in the house, while the roommate also stayed elsewhere.

When the poster later tried to talk it through, the conversation fell apart. She said her best friend became defensive, claimed she did not know anything was wrong and said the whole situation was overwhelming. The poster eventually snapped and said she had been treated terribly for two days, then immediately apologized for yelling. They both apologized in the end, but the poster said it felt like her friend did not really take accountability.

Commenters were overwhelmingly on the poster’s side. One told her the friendship had clearly changed and that she was no longer the best friend in the same way. Another said the friend did not know how to balance a relationship and a visiting guest, especially in public settings involving alcohol. Several people said leaving a visiting friend alone in a crowded bar where she knew no one was unacceptable.

Others focused on the cost and effort. One commenter said the friend had begged her to come because it required no sacrifice from the friend — no money, no schedule changes and no real hosting effort. The grocery trip summed it up for them: after the poster spent hundreds of dollars and a miserable day traveling, the friend still could not be bothered to feed her.

By the end of the thread, most people seemed to think the poster had learned something painful but clear. She may still care about the friendship they used to have, but the visit showed her where she stands now.

The trip was supposed to be a reunion with a best friend. Instead, she paid to fly across the country, bought her own groceries, got left alone in a crowded bar, slept in a chair while her belongings were put outside a bedroom door, and spent the weekend watching her best friend choose her boyfriend over her again and again.